Posts Tagged ‘jobs’

Congress’ Job Creation Plan (UNCLASSIFIED)

Thursday, January 21st, 2010

Congress’ Job Creation Plan (UNCLASSIFIED)
This scheme will be known as RAPE (Retire Aged People Early).

workers

Due to the current financial situation caused by the slowdown in the economy, Congress has decided to implement a scheme to put workers of 50 years of age and above on early retirement, thus creating jobs and
reducing unemployment.

Persons selected to be RAPED can apply to Congress to be considered for
the SHAFT program (Special Help After Forced Termination).

Persons who have been RAPED and SHAFTED will be reviewed under the SCREW
program (System Covering Retired-Early Workers).

A person may be RAPED once, SHAFTED twice and SCREWED as many times as
Congress deems appropriate.

Persons who have been RAPED could get AIDS (Additional Income for
Dependants & Spouse) or HERPES (Half Earnings for Retired Personnel
Early Severance).

Obviously persons who have AIDS or HERPES will not be SHAFTED or SCREWED
any further by Congress.

Persons who are not RAPED and are staying on will receive as much SHIT
(Special High Intensity Training) as possible. Congress has always
prided themselves on the amount of SHIT they give our citizens.

Should you feel that you do not receive enough SHIT, please bring this
to the attention of your Congressman, who has been trained to give you
all the SHIT you can handle.

Sincerely,
The Committee for Economic Value of Individual Lives (E.V.I.L.)

PS – - Due to recent budget cuts and the rising cost of electricity, gas
and oil, as well as current market conditions, the Light at the End of
the Tunnel has been turned off.

Lets Get Your Opinion:

Have You Forgotten The President and Congress’ Failed  Promise about creating jobs.

Yes_     No_

If you answered No then you’re  part of the population that doesn’t care and will be sucked into the cesspool of no freedom, no job and hopelessness.

Continue To Have Fun Along The Way To Our Financial Recovery

Monday, November 23rd, 2009

“Good humor is a tonic for mind and body. It is the best antidote for anxiety and depression. It is a business asset. It attracts and keep friends. It lightens human burdens. It is the direct route to serenity and contentment.”

~Greenville Kleisser

 Picture by D. [SansPretentionAucune] (•̪●) ✪

Picture by D. [SansPretentionAucune

We simply must balance the weight of the economic crisis we’re living day to day, and replace it with an emotional lightness that comes with having fun with friends and family. We have a right to worry and plan for the future, but we would be wrong to forget to have fun along the way. We simply won’t make it a better tomorrow if we don’t take time to enjoy life today. Take it from me; my entire life has been lived in the name of delayed gratification. You can do better; you can have fun along the way with family and friends.

We would do well as a nation to remember the importance of taking responsibility for our own lot in life. I think there is a danger in putting too much pressure on the individual. I don’t mean that the government should pick up the slack and neither do most Americans. Our public institutions are weakening and are in no condition to be relied upon except in a time of crisis.

Pull your life together consider whether you are happy at your JOB, or your JOB is taking away too much time from your personal life and separation from family. You should consider a career change and look for something to provide financial independence, more personal time and having fun along the way of accomplishing these goals.